A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Chuck norris doesnt mow his lawn, He calls someone to do it for him and then he pays them a great deal of money considering he has a large lawn.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock-Knock Come in! ...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats worse than a dog biting you? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than a necrophobiac in a morgue? A necrophiliac. What's worse than a necrophiliac in a morgue? Seeing your family hacked to death by an evil axe murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Son: Mommy, Mommy can i have a cookie! Mom:Sure Honey there on the top shelf Son:But mommy i have no arms Mom:No arms, No cookies

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Two carnivorous dinosaurs get into a fight. Carnage ensues and many baby dinosaur eggs are stomped on, and in the end they both die.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why is 6 afraid of 7? haha! because 7 ate 9 no because 7 is black

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's dirtier than an ice cream cone rolled in dirt? The dirt it was rolled in.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man gets hit by a car. His family is sad and plans a funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do blondes and rocks have in common? they are both material and have extension.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

angelosnyder is not gay

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your mom is so poor that she collect food stamps is on welfare and lives in section 8 housing and cannot find a job that provides her a livable wage

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What looks like half of an apple? The other half.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops