How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, Violets are blue. sama bin laden, is coming for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot. what do you call a woman flying a plane? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the Mexican Have for Thanksgiving Dinner? A Turkey you racist!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

woman..parallel parking

thumb_up thumb_down +12

CORRECTION TO THE COMMENT BELOW! Its a WIN/WIN/WIN/WINWINWINWINWINWIN (WIN For at least 30 more minutes)/CUUUUM!/"SORE ASS WHINING CHILD Gonna grow into a slut SITUATION!" friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man The Anti-Christ: Do not thumb me down unless you want to feel the big burning hot spear of darkness, and you do not... You better don`t be or become a sore ass kid you allshole if you know what I am saying... Yeah! Thats right! You better fear me! Because the angrier you look... The more offended you become... The better you are starting to look...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

thumb_up thumb_down +10

rocky is staring at us from outside...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Three women are sitting in a bar. One is drinking beer, one is drinking wine and one is drinking vodka. Which one is the widow? The one whose husband is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats funnier then a dead baby a dead baby dressed as a clown

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why couldn't Bruce drive a truck? Cause Bruce was a Fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

This is a joke only for males: Walk into any semi busy public restroom. Stand at the urinal for about 30 seconds to a minute acting as though you cannot find your penis. Make sure you have the attention of at least 2 other urinators and then exclaim quite loudly "I can't find it!" then walk out.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops