What did the black man say when he noticed his crack was missing? I guess they fixed the sidewalk while I was at work.

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Roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme fridge

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A black man and a mexican jump off a building at the same time, who lands first? Who cares?

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Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

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How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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What’s worse than being ruled by Adolf Hitler? Being ruled by Joseph Stalin.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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Why did the hockey cross the road? To get to KFC.

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A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

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Thats a real shame. How come your eyes are red to begin with? You can use hypnosis to change the color, but if you never learned how, I am not gonna teach you.

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

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What's worse then an adult dying A baby dying

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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What green and has wheels? grass I lied about the wheels

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Did you hear about the 2 pretzels walking down the street? It's not true, pretzels are not capable of autonomous movement.

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Why was the man hanging from a tree? He got the Death Penalty

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I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

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knock knock, Whos there ? ( runs away ) trololololololololol

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Cause its dead!

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How do you get a girl out of a tree? You throw a refrigirator at her.

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What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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