What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

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Knock knock Who's There? Me I kill you again HA HA HA

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Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

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What do you call an arabic man who sells bombs for a living? A business man.

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Obamacare

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KONY 2012

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wat is the name of a girl u can play connect the dots on her face laurie pisciotta

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Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

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Girl: I love you in a platonic way Guy: ... Is that some kind of fat joke!

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Nice belt.

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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what did the white guy say to the black guy at the homeless shelter? Hi.

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- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

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Turnabout: American study of the Japanese Stereotype man: Murican: Excuse me Mr Japanese. Jap: The answer is within the heart of battle.. Murican: Yes but I just want to ask you some few questions. Jap: You are disturbing my feng shui I must power of the mystical fireball of surge fist energy get... *uppercuts waterfall BECAUSE REASONS!* Murican: What? But this is a serious study! Jap: Sowwy I do nothe speeky the shamefull language of the engrish! Murican: But you just said... Sigh... Conclusion: Carpet bombing of Japan funding increased. "slap a Jap" commercial project from world war two reinstated for the safety of the American people. Experiment two: The study of a American man raised in Japan. Murican: Hello I wonder if... American raised in japan: GADOUKEN GADOUKEN GADOUKEN! ORA ORA! Murican: Dead/KO. American/Japan: FRAWRESS VICTOLY! Result: World war 3 GET!

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A black man walks Into a bar.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

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how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

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Why did the boy with cancer cross the road? He was hoping to get hit by a truck.

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Knock knock! *no answer* KNOCK KNOCK! *still no answer* the person who was knocking finds a note sticked on the door and it says: i will be away for 2 weeks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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