You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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Q:What's the difference between my refrigerator and the trunk of my car? A: There isn't a spare tire in my refrigerator.

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

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what do u call 2 puerto rician men playing basketball? won on won

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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Female rights.

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What's the worst thing about African poverty? The fact that there is no foreseeable solution to the problem of millions suffering.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

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Friends are like potatoes, If you eat them, they will die.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

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VAGINA.

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What do you call a man with a gun? An accident waiting to happen.

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A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Losing a family member in 9/11.

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do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

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A nun with shoes on walks into a bar with her husband.

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i didn't listen to a word you just said but...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops