A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call it when you see a black man break his arm? There isn't really any name but I suggest he seeks medical attention.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How much wood could the woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A relatively small amount compared to the amount of trees in the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what is the difference between the black orphan and the white orphan.... the black orphan died after i raped it

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why was the woman afraid of her bestfriend he raped her

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you say to a jew with blood on his leg? Are you okay?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. Question is, how did they get in there?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats hard, its not what you think a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops