What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

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Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

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Why did the guy to the moo moo cow say? Yesterday, I took a crap at the restaurant and the toilet got stuck so I stole the vehicle and won the lottery.

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Red are roses, blue are violets I'm dislexic.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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What did one stool say to the other stool? Stools don't speak!

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What is a vampire's favorite desert? Assuming they are real I dont think they would enjoy it in the daylight, so really there's no point.

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a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

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What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

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Justin Beiber's Talent.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

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What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

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Yo mama is so ugly that she won an award for that

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Why did the boy jump off a bridge? Because he saw it on tv

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What's a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

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Why couldn't the little girl see in the dark? She had no eyes.

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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roses are red carnations are white dont go to bed or ill f**k your friend dwite

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Dr. I need a new butt, mine has a crack in it.

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why cant stephen hawking dance He does not enjoy dancing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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