What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

what did the dog say to the cat? give me back my dog food.

8 muslims walk into a bar You know why. Because their suicidal bombing plans were put off until Tuesday

What has four legs but can't walk? A tranquilized bear

why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

What did the boy get for christmas? a new lining

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was peckish.

its funny cuz i laughed!

Who gets more action than my best friend Reese? My raped cousin....

balls

"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? 10 dead trashcans in 1 baby

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John, your son. Now open the door.

What is worse than 3 lesbians in a telephone booth? 6 squirrels donkey punching your urethra.

Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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