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Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

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How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

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How did Chinese people get their names? They throw their pots and pans down the stairs. It says, "CHING CHANG CHONG!!!"

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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Yo mammas so stupid she has a profound intellectual disability.

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Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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Knock knock

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why is king kong so fat? because he eats to mucj

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the Mortgage company. You haven't payed your loans. The man loses his house and becomes homeless.

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I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

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what long green and bumpy? a pickle

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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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Have you ever seen that really famous blind man's house? Neither has he.

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what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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why did the mushroom go to the party? because he`s a fungi

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An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

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"Oren" Tifa is not around here, besides she does not like you anymore, get lost you wacko!

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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