Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple that has just been brutally murdered. If you see this, you should probably notify the local police so that they may investigate the situiation.

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A man was driving in his BMW one day when a mini passed him out on the fast lane. The BMW driver thought 'i can't have that!' so he sped up and overtook the mini. Unfortunately he wasn't paying attention and he drove into the back of a school bus. Ironically the bus contained the mini driver's 3 daughters, he was driving so fast because they had forgotten to bring their lunch and he was trying to catch up with the bus so he could give them their sandwiches. There were no survivors of the crash, except for the mini driver.

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Your momma is soooo poor... I don't know how she is so fat

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Why did the man go bra shopping? Cause he is a single father and his teenage daughter needs a new one.

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What do you call an elephant on the moon? Dead.

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Man 1: HEY DUDE! Man 2: Go shoot yourself

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A priest, R Kelly, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar. They proceed to molest small children.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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What did the priest do to the little crying boy in an enclosed room? He forgave the boy for his sins. Then he raped him.

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

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Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

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A drunk man is that last one inside a very popular bar. He passed out on the counter before he ordered a drink. The bartender is angry at a sale lost, which would have been his millionth sale before closing time on the 1000th day of business. He goes home and hangs himself.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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What did the mute girl say to the other mute girl?

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pudding

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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