What's long and hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber

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How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

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On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

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why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Steal her cookies

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there?

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a dog, Meow.

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Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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Your mom is so dumb that all of society says she was poorly educated.

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My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

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Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

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If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

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Safe sex MR

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ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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It is true that Trump will make America great again.

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Hail Heetluh

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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what do you get when you combine a vampire,werewolf,and whiny girlfriend ....... the worst show in the history of the earth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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