Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

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Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

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I violate everyone that do not thumb me green, and vi0late the children, the parents, and the person of those that thumb me red... Its not about the sex, its about the domination... You might even like it...Your kids? Not so much... Well sometimes... Green thumb me, and I will... Meh, then you are awesome... friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Subscribe below, address tracker activated... LETS GO!

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A man walks into a bar, and sees another man with a huge orange head. He asks the bartender, "Do you know why that man has such a huge orange head?" The bartender replies: I dont know, maybe if you buy him a drink he'll tell you. So that man walks over to the man with a huge orange head and buys him a drink. He says to him: Excuse me, sir but why do you have a big orange head? The man with the big orange head replies: Well, one day I was walking along the beach and I found an interesting bottle. So I opened it and out popped a genie. He told me I had three wishes. The first thing I asked for was to have all the money that I wanted, and the means to get more. Suddenly, My pockets were overflowing with cash. So then I wished for the most beautiful, perfect woman ever created and there she appeared in front of me, and we immediately fell in love. The third thing I asked for was a huge orange head.

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Some jokes rhyme, But this one doesn't

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What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

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Why did the farmer's wife leave the farm? Because she was a lesbian.

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Anthony sucks

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

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What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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How do you dance to the black eyed peas? You don't you listen

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What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

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how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

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Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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A cockroach walks into a bar. The bar seems to have a pest problem.

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Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops