Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

thumb_up thumb_down +4

One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the road was clear of oncoming traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You have Aids. April fools! you have super Aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

s

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's red, fast, and flies through the air? A tomato in a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do grizzly bears and people have in common? Neither can survive in outer space, due to depressurization, lack of oxygen, and absence of basic survival needs.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

roses are red violets are blue last time i dropped something this hard it ended world war 2?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the blondes left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they haven't met yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman. ym

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the black man say to the white man standing next to him? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +4

yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man walked into a bar. He got a head trauma and committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Church.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I have a dig bick you that read wrong you read that wrong too.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is the difference between a black man and a bench A bench can support a family of five

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man killed himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

7+5=12

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between an ant and a dinosaur? They are both birds, apart from the ant and the dinosaur

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops