Why are you looking here? The joke's in your hand.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

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I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

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I treat women like I treat dead bodies. With respect.

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Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

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How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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Hi

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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Your mother is so overweight that she decided to have liposuction and then proceeded to live a wonderful life.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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How many British people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two. One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the flashlight because the room is probably dark.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is a highly unlikely circumstance due to the fact that there are no wild chickens and most chicken coops are nowhere near a road

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Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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