Why couldn't the little girl color in her coloring book? Her arms were amputated.

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A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

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What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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What do you do when a hispanic man takes your wallet? Ask him to please give the wallet back to you

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Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands, when they first came out. Well, I say bought. I actually stole it from a short, fat ginger kid.

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? They were both once alive and innocent, I lied about the black guy.

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In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

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Why did the old man drop his milk? He had a stroke.

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Why is pi? Because circles.

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How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

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What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

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Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

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How to confuse a dumbass: see previous post.

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whats white and pointless? chalk.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

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A blode takes a trip to her favorite restaurant. She arrives safely. After consuming a delicious meal she dies of cancer.

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What is white And taste like sheep A sheep

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Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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