Your mom is so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

A dyslexic canadian walks into an arab

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

Where was I born? Pakistan. You?

a man walks in to a bar he says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey laugh" so he goes in there and makes it laugh and gets a free beer ant then the next day he goes in and says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey cry" so he goes in there and makes the horse cry and the bartender says " i will give you a free beer but first tell me what you did to make my donkey laugh and cry" the man says " first to make the donkey laugh i told the donkey i had a bigger penis than him then to make him cry i showed him

Why did the irishman go to the bar? because he was a designated driver and was picking up his friend.

One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

Hitler.. Hitlar... Hillar... Hillary Clinton

Why didn't the monkey cross the road? He saw the chicken get run over.

What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

How to confuse a dumbass: see previous post.

Roofs are Red...I have a Cunt!!!

Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

If Miley Cyrus has the ability to come in like a wrecking ball, how come she can't twerk?

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

Why was six afraid of seven? because seven had diarrhea

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Is maynaise an instrument?

How do you get a one handed man out of a tree Wave

whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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