When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Nothing, we eat pizza and we respect Jews.

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Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

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That's what SHE said!

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What's the same between a school bus and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the bus.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

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your moms my other ride

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Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

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I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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What do you call a police woman who shaves her pubes? PC Marion Jones

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A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

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yo mama so fat she has diabetes.

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What's better than winning the paraplegic Olympics? Walking.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

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your mother hates you

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What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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what did meredith and nick have in common an i

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops