Gary: Hey Bill, wanna hear a joke? Bill: Yes Gary: Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what is the difference between coke and pepsi? -they are competing soft drinks made by different brands

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Who lost World War II? The Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you have if you have a green ball in your right hand and a green ball in your left hand? Two green balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What did the alcoholic get for his Birthday?\ A: A Jail Sentence

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what was the biggest game of hide and seek? World War II and the Jews won

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I LIKE TRAINS

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

thumb_up thumb_down -12

can i have a cookie no diabeto!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

So what do you guys wanna do?? Anything, I still have cancer..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

yo mama is so fat even dora cant explore her

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf which impairs the ability to register sights and sounds necessary to operate an automobile.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is the square-root of pi? ?pi

thumb_up thumb_down -14

you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops