How many vampires does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Vampires do not exist

thumb_up thumb_down -2

where do you find sunglasses at? the store

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the chicken cross the road? the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The grass is always greener on the side that uses manure and fertilizer daily.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Brooklyn Nets or New Jersey Nets? Theres a difference

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever seen Ethiopian food? No, neither have Ethiopians.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

WHAT'S LESS THAN 0? FIONN'S DIGNITY AFTER HENRY'S

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the gay kid beaten to death Because he was also an outstanding racist and lived in a highly populated african american community.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy cross the road He didnt he got hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why does blond women give great blowjob? Because they has vaacum in thier heads! Blond woman coment; well thats better than having nothing at all in your head! :-)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -2

James got up from the couch, forgetting what he got up for he asked his girlfriend, Mary: "What did I get up for again?" Mary replied "To get your medicine for your amnesia."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo momma so fat, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's a fail with a bowl on its head, a 30 year old, and a 5 year old at the same time? Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a Nazi.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops