Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at rhyming Refrigerator.

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Why was the man reading various news articles on the Internet at 2:21 in the morning? Because at that time he could not sleep. Which meant he tried to find something else to fill his time up with.

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Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

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An Irish man walked into a bar. He turned to the bartender and said hello. Then walked to the back booth for his lunch meeting with the heads of his highly profitable company and then went home.

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Your mother is a very respectable woman.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A human pretending to be a dog A human pretending to be a dog who? Errr...I mean...woof

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What's brown and dirty? Dirt.

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Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

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Today is May 18 2016.

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Black people. They are so kind.

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Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

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Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a pleasant evening as they talk to each other about their day over a relaxing drink.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

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"Doctor, Doctor I think I am a pair of curtains" The man was swiftly referred to the psychiatric ward.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

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What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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