What'd the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish, remember?

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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What do you get when you cross a horse and a donkey? a mule

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A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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Where can find a man who owns a white van capable of transporting many children? Most local churches have them for mission work. I would contact a local minister.

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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Your mom is fat

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How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

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Why was the ghost boy sad? He was attending his own funeral.

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What smells like peanut butter but looks like a penis? A penis, I lied about the peanut butter.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Ask him to come down.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

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A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

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Yo mamma's so fat, at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that if she did not attempt to control her weight gain through a careful moderation of her diet and began exercising on a regular basis, that her obesity would soon manifest itself in a variety of chronic health conditions that would permanently alter her ability to enjoy life and could significantly decrease her lifespan.

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Why did Eduardo cross the road. The same reason he crossed the border.

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Q:why did the boy fall off the swing A:he had no arms Q:why couldn't he get up A:he had no legs Q:why did he die A:he fell in a puddle

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Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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Knock Knock Who's There Santa Santa Who? I stole your dog.

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I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

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Where did Ann go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I threatened to throw a fridge at it

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What did the hooker say to her employer after 1 hour....you owe my $20

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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