Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

What's the square root of four? Two.

A man walks into a pole.

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

How do you confuse a blonde? You ask her a question.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

A man walks into a 1980's style restaurant he takes a seat and orders his meal.

Get me a sandwich, bitch

Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

Why did the man mow his lawn without his shirt on? Because it was very hot out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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