You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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Q: what do you call a drunk blond? A: a cab

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

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What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

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(Put joke here)

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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If there are 50 oranges and 50 waffles tied to a fence post. How many cow utters does it take to shit green? urine.

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Q) Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest A) Real Joke : Because the parrots-eat-em-all

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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oooh look a banshee

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Your mama is so fat she suffered from diabetes and died of heart failure .

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Knock Knock Who's there? its the police mam your son has been killed by a hit and run driver, the driver was an alcohol

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand: QUACK!

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

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you and your family will die tonight

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Fiats

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What do you call a black priest who's name is John? Father John

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Yeah, so I was partially right when I assumed that you joined the feds in order to make sure the past would not repeat itself huh? The underground society never broke a simple rule, a single law, it simple grew from a bunch of dopeheads, to people capable of creating nuclear weapons... Just a matter of speaking of course.

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a man and a woman walk into a alley. They get mugged the man fights back out of pride and then gets stabbed the woman escapes and then goes to the police the man is then found two days later. *gasp* what a weird dream.

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Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

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A man walks up to a gay guy and says "you are socially accepted"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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