im not as random as you think I- Potato

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

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What's the difference between gays and straights? Sexual orientation

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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Call me a banana. You're a banana. No I'm not

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Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

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A black man and a white man and a chinese man are sitting together: Cultural Diversity.

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What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

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Why is Kyle so gay. Nobody knows

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

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roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

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25

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knock, knock come in

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

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Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops