Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black man in space? A space monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

knock, knock come in

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Me and me!!!! LOL! i'm a comedian!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he swallowed his shoe. But it turns out his dream was real, and he died because he could not digest a whole shoe.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You spent your time reading this and realized there was no joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did brad pay the sexy looking librarian with a big smile on his face? Becouse brad returned his books to late and had to pay a fine for that. The librarian made a joke about the fact that it was a waste of money to return the books late.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the blond become a lawyer? She didnt. After many years of collage and studying, she broke down and quit, and became a stripper.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What word is ten letters long and starts with gas? Gastronomy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo momma's so fat that when she went to Seaworld and a whale saw her, looked away, and continued on with its daily life.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is scary? Obama might get reelected.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many Freudians does it take to screw your mother - I mean, a lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mom is intimately familiar with many mens' penis due to her many years as a successful urologist.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo mama is so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops