What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

What's long and hard and looks like plastic? A plastic baton.

How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

pickle sniffer

What is shaped like a duck without a beak? A duck that I punch the beak off of.

Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

colby doesnt shave

If a man has a gun, but no arms or legs, is he armed?

What's another name for a black priest? An African American Priest.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

Your mother is so stupid that she has an IQ score that is much lower than the average person.

Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

How do you scare a blonde woman? Tie her up and mutilate her family while she watches.

Q. What is a brown cow called? A. A cow.

A black man trips and falls down. You help him up and ask him if he needs any help. After a brief friendly talk you both continue on your separate ways.

Q: What did Batman say to Robin when he noticed he had lost his belt? A: Robin! Q:What did Robin respond? A: Yes?

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

A man walked into a bar because he worked there.

yo mama is so old i told her to act her own age and she told me to shut up and get out of her house.

What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

Why did the chicken eat fried chicken? Because fried chicken is so good! Kelvin Yang.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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