Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

Please Rape William Wright

A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

Why are old people such terrible drivers? As we age, our eyesight slowly deteriorates and our reflexes become slower. So, in order to be cautious, the elderly avoid high speed chases and such to maintain their and others safety. Or they could have alzheimers and not realize they are in a moving vehicle at all, it's really a tossup

Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

Q: What is, in full, Donald Trump's speech to the Republican National Convention? A: This. I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! I'm Donald Trump! I'm Donald Trump! Trump trump trump trump trump trump trump! Trump tromp troomp trimp treemp tramp trump trump trump!

What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

Why did the mathematician cross the road? To get his mail.

What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and broccoli? A lot.

Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, "Oh...Well, that's not so bad. At least I don't have AIDS."

how do you save a black guy from drowning. with a life preserver.

What's worse then a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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