Person 1: Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide? Person 2: It works very well.

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Hey, you pee here? Yes, it's called a urinal

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Why couldn't the blond turn the TV on? Because she is blond.

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Why is MLA important? Because if Mothers didn't Love Anyone society would collapse and we would go into a nuclear war and blow up the earth, and the apocalypse would happen and dinosaurs would rule once again until another meteor hits the earth.

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Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

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Why wouldn't you want OJ Simpson babysitting your kids? Why? He's in jail and he wouldn't be available when you needed him

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How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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Janey Had her first kiss with Jonny. Jonny choked on her ridiculously large was of gum and died.

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he clearly has an owner that doesn't fence him in.

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Antijoke the book. Seriously it sucks ass, do not bother, they only included the very worst ones.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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What do a Jew and a Vegan have in common? They both won't eat pork products.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

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That's why her hair is so big, she teases it and uses a lot of expensive products.

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how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

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What's worse than the holocaust. I'm a Nazi so the holocaust wasn't actually that bad.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your friend Jim Oh hello Jim, please come in it is very nice to see you this fine evening.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There are many circumstances that could affect the outcome of the situation. One of them is whether or not the given people have or will soon obtain a ladder. In this case, the lightbulb could take more time than needed to be screwed in and effectively changed. Another key factor in the situation is the number of people. If there are enough people to reach the ceiling without a ladder, the lightbulb could be screwed in sooner or later than asked by the owner of the facility in which the lightbulb socket is installed. Finally, the height of the persons given is a crucial point in this situation. The people may be tall, thus allowing there to be fewer people needed. The people could be short and need a greater number of people than if the people were, perhaps, a bit taller. All in all, I'd say about 1-2.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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