Q: why did the guys neck hurt after the car crash A: he had a sun burn

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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Where did Susie go after an explosion? Everywhere

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hi will

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Q-What do you call kids who go to school? A- Students.

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Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

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What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

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What happened when a boy used the wrong punctuation and grammar, plus forgot how to spell the word know? i dont ;now!!!!!!!!!

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What would Hitler say if you give him a sandwich? Thankyou!

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Why did the cancer patient shave his head? He wanted to pretend he still had hair.

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Woman's rights.

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i like turtals and kids

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Its Matt.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

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http://logs.omegle.com/de4e4b0

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A person who has black, white, and red paint on his or her body.

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What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

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What is long and black? Some umbrellas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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