Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

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A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

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what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

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What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

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What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -A kazoo. -A kazoo who? -A small, simple musical instrument consisting of a hollow pipe with a hole in it, over which is a thin covering that vibrates and produces a buzzing sound when the player sings or hums into the pipe.

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Why do black people eat watermelon? Because it is a largely water-based, delicious fruit that provides refreshment in such a hot country and conveniently flourishes in the said climate.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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Why did the bus crash? Because the driver was a watermelon.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

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Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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