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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems Nice tits

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A guy walks into a bar, and then is hit with the full force of all the things he never did in life, of how he wasted his younger years chasing a bigger paycheck rather than trying to live life, and all the love he wasted on people who didn't care about him. He begins to cry as his first drink arrives, and orders many more as the night passes. He loses his keys as he leaves and stumbles home in a drunken stupor, contemplating suicide.

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

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Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? Because Johnny's a goldfish.

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stair I don't know? A:Because he wasn't careful

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies? You can't buy a bakers dozen of dead babies at Tim Hortons.

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How did the suicide bomber die? Cancer.

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So an Indian walks into a bar and says: ? ?? ??? ?????? ??? ??? ? ??? ??? ??????

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia ...where am I

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fatest boner fatest boner fatest boner to adam ramsden

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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

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Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

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Q: Why were the chicken and the cow friends? A: Because they shared common interests.

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Think of your favorite joke. Thats so weird! Thats exactly the same as this joke!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas Nothing he didnt live that long

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A gay man came out 5 years ago, he also has not heard his farts since... He lost his ears in a boating accident that same year

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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