Why are chaos theorists so predictable? Because their arguments usually follow a logical set of points.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what is a jews favorite holiday? the halocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

there are some things i dont get. Quantum Physics is one of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What has 8 legs , 6 eyes and 3 mouths ? - A cowboy riding a horse while holding a chicken .

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when you cross a third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil? A third edition X-19 TQRFT scooter with a teal-colored pencil on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the guy who walked into a bar say? Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than cancer? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the black man jump off a cliff? He's been emotionally unstable ever since he witnessed the brutal murder of his parents as a child and could no longer live with himself, so he decided to commit suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

68

thumb_up thumb_down +10

So joe diragi walks out of a gay bar...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's 4+7 47

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why don't women need watches? Because they probably have a cell phone, which works just as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops