Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

How did the priest die? Masterbation

Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them they die.

So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John. John Anderson. Dude we've been friends since first grade! You really don't remember me? I'm going home!

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

hi corey

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

four people walk into a maze with a billion dollars in the middle.the people are santa clause, the easter bunny, a smart mexican, and a dumb mexican. Who gets the money. oviously the dumb mexican gets it. why you ask. because the other three are not real.

What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

I lost my tractor.

What Happened to the man with no arms? Nothing, he continued his life with his daily routine of using his feet to accomplish his goals that day.

Women.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Why is jim retarded? Because he fucks chickens

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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