What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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Yes.

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Yo mama's so fat that she took a look at her life and realized she wanted a change so she joined a dieting group and started eating better and exercising more and she got down to her goal weight and now looks and feels better than ever it's very inspirational, good for her.

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take out the f in way. there is no f in way. I see what you did there.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

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24

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Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

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What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

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I'm gay. No homo.

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a unicorn without a horn? A horse.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mark. Oh Hai Mark

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whats the difference between colby and a high schooler? Colby hasn't matured yet

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Womens Rights.

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Knock knock. Death.

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Penis

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Why did the chiken cross the road? Well its wing were clipped so it couldnt fly across the road.

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Roses Are red violets are blue I HAVE FIVE FINGERS THE MIDDLE IS FOR U

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what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

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Scientology.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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