What does Ke$ha feel like when getting up in the morning? Shit because she has a nasty hangover.

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Q: What is the difference between everything and nothing? A: everything! Moral: NOTHING!

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The inter- You have cancer

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What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

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Paul and Steve, Siamese twins attached at the head, come to a fork in the road they are traveling. Paul wants to go left, while Steve wants to go right. They pause for a moment to figure out which direction would be the best choice for the both of them. They decide to go Paul's way, and as they continue to travel in silence, they try to imagine what life as a self-reliant individual would be like.

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Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

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What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

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Whats cooler than cool? Ice Cold.

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How to do you kill a blonde? Various methods, most effective of which is firing squad

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

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What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

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I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

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a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

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An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

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Q: What did the chinese man say to the other Chinese man? A: I don't know, I don't sneak Chinese

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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YOLO MAH BROLO

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Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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women have rights

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why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family of four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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