How did the blind man eat his soup? With a spoon. Despite no vision, the man could feel the shape of what he was touching.

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How could problems have been avoided in the old west? Bigger towns

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

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What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

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A Jew and a German walk in a bar. they've accepted their peoples past and learned to move on with their lives

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My butt!!!!

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

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What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

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Knock Knock Who's there? No one was there. It was two birds flew into the door and died.

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Yo mama's so fat she couldn't ride on roller coasters with you in Disney world. Sometimes you wish you could share more fond memories with her.

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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twilight

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What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

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A blind man walks into a bar

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

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Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

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A boy asks his teacher to go to the bathroom, she says ok but only if he can sya the alphabet. He says ok, but for some reason skips the letter P. How come? -Because he has a sever learning disability and is having a hard time remebering all the letters of the alphabet

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What's funnier than Carrot Top and Dane Cook combined? Almost anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops