How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

I have no ideas.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

hey guys check out my cool youtube video at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivQ_bezJjK0

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

say this really fast dick chick, chick, dick, dick chick,chick dick, dick chick if you cant like it

What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you? Run.

Two dogs walk into a room. What a fine example of two dogs walking into a room.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...