What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Why can't Hank drive? Hank is a stone.

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You are what you eat, so... Can we not talk about this? Cause for me it's recently been sort of sexual. ... How can it be ?.... Ohhhh, dude, that's disgusting...

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Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

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2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

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Whats 9 + 10? 19

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whats 2+2? 4

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What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

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Jason Connor.

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yo mamma's so stupid, she is not that smart.

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An Asian gets into her car to drive to her grandmother's house. She arrives at 6:30 and has a wonderful dinner.

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Person 1: What did the narwhal say to the other narwhal. Person 2: I don't know... What? Person 1: How am I supposed to know? Shortly after a serious argument breaks out.

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What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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What's cooler than being cool? Being really cool

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How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

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how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

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Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

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Yo mama's house is so small that she had to get a better job in order to buy a bigger one.

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this is a joke

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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