What did the baby say to its mother after breastfeeding? Nothing

whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

Why didn't the blonde get into college? She was killed in a car accident.

Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

The Holocaust

where are you?

You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

Abe Lincholn had a son :) But he died |:

How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

What do you call an indian who is underwater? A scuba diver.

Did you know every 46 seconds somebody commits suicide Thumbs up for pancakes!

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

I have no ideas.

Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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