Women's Rights.

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'd like some H2O" The second says "I'd like some H2O as well." Nobody dies.

I WILL DESTROY ISIS

What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

A mushroom walks into a bard and the bartender admonishes him and tells him to leave. The mushroom says "Aw, c'mon...you stupid jerk!"

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob Who? Bob the human.........

whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't, there were no roads back then

What is hotter than two girls making out? The Sun.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

How much does a mexican immigrant get paid? Less an minimum wage.

What is the biggest fictional book ever made? Either the Bible, or the Dictionary.

Excuse me, do you happen to have the time? No.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

what do you call a retarded kid? jack kamstra

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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