If you say woman really fast it sounds like make me a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why do black guys have brown skin ? Because there born that way

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A-B-C-D-E-F-G-R-U-D-T-F With me

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Frog-why did the chicken cross the road Chicken-dont judge me...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Woman decides she wants to stop making sanwiches for her sexist boyfriend. She walks away and lives a happy life. In hell.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

guess what chicken butt

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the orange elephant with 6 legs say? Kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats brown and sticky? Anal sex

thumb_up thumb_down +10

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops