What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

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What's green and has wheels? A snow flake. I lied about the wheels, and the color.

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What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

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Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

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3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

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Yo momma's so fat, she slipped into a diabetic coma.

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A black man walks into a bar. It turns out he is a notorious serial killer and he procedes to violently murder everyone in the bar.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

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What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

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A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

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whats water and frozen? an ice cube

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

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Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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Who can you NOT apply the term "Gentle Giant" to? Dwarfs.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Nick!" Because he knows him and is not racist.

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My Joke Is The Persons Below Me I I V

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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