- Anti Joke

Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

There was once a simple man. His life was far from what could be described as extravagant, living alone in a dingy apartment full of leaking taps and insects and lacking a working refrigerator. He wasn't an ungrateful man but he often wondered why life was cruel to him and prayed every night for something magical to happen, whether it be a brand new life, or even something simple like a new fridge. One fateful late afternoon as he staggered along the dim backstreet, partially crippled and pained from his standard day of labour, he came across a brass lamp just laying in the street. Glancing around, the man bent down to pick it up, knowing very well the story of the genie in the lamp having just watched Aladdin the previous night. Peering into its dull surface, he saw eyes staring back at him, eyes he didn't recognise. Anxiously, he ran his hands over the surface of the lamp, feeling the coolness of the metal on his rough blistered hands. But nothing happened! Disappointed but desperate for his dreams to be fulfilled, the man frantically shook the lamp, tears streaming down his face, wonder how life could be so cruel. Then a fridge fell out of the lamp and crushed him and he died the end.

Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

What's red, white, and black all over? A panda shot and killed by a poacher.

Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

What did nike say to addidas? Hi

Whats worse than a Worm in Your Apple? Being raped

The penn state football administration

Woman's rights

Six million.

Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

What do you call someone allergic to water ? Waterproof

how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

whats stupid and gay all of my friends

The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

What's black and tasteless? either herpes or a redheads soul

Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??