What did the man say when he saw a truck in his yard? There's a truck in my yard.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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What is worse than hell?

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If she's old enough for jail, than shes old enough to rail.

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What does Free Candy and a Free game online have in common? They both have viruses

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What did the young boy get for christmas? Parental divorce

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

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knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

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Murder me once, shame on you.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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I like to eat people

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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Why didn't the little boy get to go to the movies on his birthday? He was both blind and deaf, completely defeating the purpose of going to the movies.

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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What do 10 dead babies in a blender sound like? Idk because I was too busy masturbating

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Ask me if I'm a peanut. Are you a peanut? Yes. Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No, I'm a peanut.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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Why did the Nazi not help the black man up after he had been badly injured? The Nazi was in a wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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