Your mom is so fat the only time she saw 90210 was on a scale.

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whats young and never moved? still born baby

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Destiny was calling me, so I picked up the phone.

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Whats big, ugly, and sucks? Death.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, the sky is grey so is the grass everything is grey, as i am colourblind

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok.

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How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga A: You pokerface

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

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What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

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What do you call an angry black man? Angry.

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A Rabbi, a Priest, and an Atheist walk into a restaurant. They receive terrible service, and do not leave a tip.

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WILSON!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a drunk cannibalistic Jew? A HeBrew!

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What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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What did Batman say to Robin befor they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

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How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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Why did the red head smoke a lot of meth? He had extreme psychological disorders due to years of abuse from peers and even family. He also had severe ADHD and had an extremely addictive personality type which made him succeptable to drug abuse. After years of therapy and failed family interventions, he dies from a meth OD.

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What do you call an anti joke with no punchline?

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What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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