A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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How many no-armed amputees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

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Knock Knock Who is it? Me, I forgot my keys on the way out oh ok...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

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What's the best part of having a doctor for a best friend? The sex.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

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WHATS WORSE THAN THE HOLOCAUST A FLAT TIRE

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My mom just died....

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What do you get if you cross a black man with a sword? A dead black man

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penis that is all

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women leaving the kitchen

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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Why did the man known to his neighbors as 'Teetotal Al' buy himself a bottle of whisky? Because there was no factual basis to his nickname.

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a show horse jumps over a bar

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A white man's bleeding cancerous tumor.

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did u hear about evan porter going out with his computer of course not because u haven't read this joke yet

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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