What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Your in the wrong hemisphere

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ollie is a fag so are you

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What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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What"s the biggest Jenga game? 9/11

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Three blind men walk into a bar but they were unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from them would be exploitative.

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Yo Momma is so ugly she probably doesn't have any friends.

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The chicken crossed the road and died. The end.

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots his virgin

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Ancient Greeks rights

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Why didn't the black man finish high school? He overdosed on heroin.

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Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

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Q.What does chuck norris eat as breakfast? ans.FOOD

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What's worse than dropping your phone in the toilet? Drinking only milk and honey for 7 days and then getting diarrhea while lying chained up completely naked with red fire ants going up your anus and all over your body while you get eaten alive in slow painfully miserable death

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Then what's your favorite team little white guy?

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Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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what did you call a downer in the medieval times? spazalot

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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The man from Poland was so dumb he was eligible to live in a supervised group home.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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