You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

your momma's an antijoke

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Once upon a time, a princess was hungry. and there was a frog wearing a tux for some reason.so the princess ate him. THE END.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What is long and hard? A: The gun used to kill my parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hey Caleb.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

thumb_up thumb_down +9

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Obama.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

gay marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? You set her on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Do you think people can change? No. They can change their mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Will gropes Ebola victims

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops