You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

penis that is all

Herman Cain

A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

look at there!! an entire dog!!

Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

whats pale and white your ass.

What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

AVI IS A FAG

What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

What's worse than a woman driver? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

a

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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