What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

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Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

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whats sad about a jew in a gas tank? nothing.

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A moth walks into a podiatrist's office, the podiatrist rubs his eyes and looks again and realizes it was just a man taking off his coat in a grandeur fashion.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Paris. Paris who? Paris, France.

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your mama is so fat she wears big pants.

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So anyways, can I have the last comment or not?

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Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

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why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

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A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

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Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did.

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What Mary short for? Due to the fact she has no legs, on account of the flesh eating she contracted after a visit to argentina thanks to the make-a-wish foundation. Mary also has cancer

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dinosours eat beagles and then unicorns eat norwalls then th shiny squarles eat you then unvirse inploads

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

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69

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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i felt like burning some calories so i lit a fat kid on fire

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he felt the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies,"You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Knock knock? Who's there? The WNBA. LOL

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a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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